Tag Archive | career

Stopping your own success

I ran across this article yesterday from Inc. Magazine titled “5 Toxic Beliefs That Ruin Careers“.

Well, that’ll stop any professional and make them click to the full article. At first thought I figured the beliefs would be believing salary equals power, trusting no one can give your proper feedback, assuming that working the longest hours produces the best work…things along those lines.

I was extremely surprise by the listed beliefs, and this article really made me think about my own attitude towards my career.

(This list was originally posted by Inc. on June 11, 2012)

  1. My self-worth is based on what others think of me.
  2. My past equals my future
  3. My destiny is controlled by the supernatural
  4. My emotions accurately reflect objective reality.
  5. My goal is to be perfect or do something perfectly.

As a young professional slowly figuring out world and defining my goals every year – I needed to hear some things on this list. Three items really struck a chord with me.

1: My self-worth is based on what others think of me (remember, this is a TOXIC belief so the correct statement is “me self-worth is NOT based on what others think of me”).
-I think that in our society today it’s disgustingly easy to compare yourself with other people. And unfortunately, comparing skills and talent usually falls behind looks, fashion and over-all personality. It can be extremely intimidating finding your way in a new environment/culture when you don’t feel worthy. And sadly, in today’s world, we put so much emphasis on networking and connections. If the right people don’t like you or support your  career, it may take longer to accomplish your goals.

5: My goal is to be perfect or do something perfectly
– Yikes. This one really made me think. I will shout it from the mountaintops, I am a perfectionist. I like things organized and with matching colors. If I write a press release, a blog post or an article – I want it to perfect. BUT, as this article says, perfection isn’t real. You can strive to excel and be the best, but you will fail, constantly fail, if you are always striving for perfection. Find a happy, middle ground. 

3: My destiny is controlled by the supernatural.
-Again, because this is a belief is toxic, the article states that “destiny is not controlled my the supernatural.” I believe, and disbelieve, the statement (Everyone prepare themselves — I am going to talk about RELIGION!!). I think that God has a plan for everything and things will ALWAYS workout, but that is supported by handwork and dedication. You are not simply handed things as free gifts. I really liked that this article talked about luck and how that does not play into your life. I’m not embarrassed to admit this, ok, maybe slightly, but I do get excited when I see my lucky number. But at the end of the day – a number/sign in the sky doesn’t mean anything. You make you’re own luck.

 

As always – thanks for any feedback and comments!

Great things to know before you turn 25

My friend tweeted an article a couple weeks ago and as soon as I saw the title, I immediately clicked over to read.

11 Things to Know at 25(ish) – published in Relevant magazine.

How could I not read this post? Shoot, I’ll be 23 in July….what if I only know a couple of these things? What if I don’t know ANY of them?!

I think this is the fastest I’ve ever read an article. While I don’t agree 100% with everything listed, this is a wonderful read for any college-grad.

(1) You have time to find to find a job you love &  (2) Get out of debt and stay out of debt. As a young college grad there is SO MUCH time to figure life out. I’ll be the first to admit, I have a hard time not stressing about, well, everything. Life, love, job, future, family, finances, friends, world….career, career, career. See? List goes on and on.

But when I take a step back and really look at the big picture, this is a time to be happy and LIVE. Things always fall into place. As for the second point – learn to budget and stay out of debt. I feel if I could give any college student financial advice it would stick strictly to budgeting. If you have time to go out on the weekends, eat out and shop, you have money to save. It can be a real slap in the face when you start paying rent and bills and debt can be the scariest monster of all.

(3) Don’t rush dating and marriage & (4) Give your best to friends and family. While there is nothing wrong with dating now (obvious of my relationship status) and getting married, this is the time to figure out your values and what you’re not willing to compromise. This is a great time to learn about yourself and what you really want in a relationship. Don’t think that marriage needs to happen right now, or tomorrow or even next week. Relationships take time to develop – and you need to be happy and settled personally before embarking on mature relationship.

This flows right into the next statement: give your best to friends and family…I’ll take it one step farther. Find out your true friends. Who is going to stand by you in a year? OK, scratch that, who will stand by you when you need them? Finding out who matters now, and showing them your thanks, is a great way to build relationships that will last.

The list by RELEVANT Magazine continues as such:

(5) Get some counseling
(6) Seek out a mentor
(7) Be part of a church
(8) Find a rhythm for spiritual disciplines
(9) Volunteer
(10) Feed yourself and the people you love
(11) Don’t get stuck

I believe the first four are extremely relevant (and important), but I do want to touch on the last seven.

(5,7,8) Find something to believe in. Prayer, faith, karma…SOMETHING. When the world travels 1,000 miles a minute and a young professional is finding his/her footing in the real world, sometimes religion/faith is the only thing that stay solid. It’s a great foundation to build life.
(6) FIND.A.MENTOR. That may need to jump to to number one. Find someone that you can turn to when you need help with a résumé, a job search or a situation at work. Make note: this is not a best friend, this is someone who will help you in your career. This is a person that cares for you – but will be honest when giving critiques and feedback.

(9, 10) We’re so blessed – share that. Go out and see the world and give back. I truly believe one person can make a difference and it is so easy to get involved with the community. As for cooking, well, it saves money and it’s healthier. I’m slowly falling in love with the kitchen and nothing makes me happier than inviting friends over for drinks and appetizers (that I made). Your wallet, and waistline, will thank you when you start cooking at home.

(11) Don’t get stuck 

“Don’t get stuck. Move, travel, take a class, take a risk. There is a season for wildness and a season for settledness, and this is neither. This season is about becoming. Don’t lose yourself at happy hour, but don’t lose yourself on the corporate ladder either. Stop every once in a while and go out to coffee or climb in bed with your journal.”

I love this excerpt from the article. Around the age of 25 you need  to know how to say no to a beer, but network at a happy hour. Know that you can change the world and can chase your dreams. Nothing is set in stone – and mistakes can be fixed.

Great way to end a wonderful article.

 

courage from the strangest places

This past Wednesday I worked my last shift as a lifeguard. An era of my life ended (I don’t know if society thinks 22-year-old should already be

referencing eras in life…but let’s just go with it). I worked at that private pool for about six years, and cannot tell you the amount of good, bad and scary times I experienced.

I have saved lives, introduced kids to water, cheered on my swimmers during swim meets and grown into a young adult – and this pool has seen it all. And, even better, I have found some fantastic co-workers and other families to call my own.When you babysit/guard/correct children’s behavior all day, you’re going to have your main ones.

last shift!

Amanda, now a beautiful 13-year-old, is without a doubt one of my favorites. She and I immediately bonded my first year at the pool. As my second little sister, we have regular trips to the mall (shopping at Justice and Limited T00) and the best ice-cream store, Flubbs. Amanda has two older brothers and needed an older sister – and I was lucky enough to pick-up another little one. Besides, who doesn’t love more siblings?

The day’s cooler temperatures virtually left the pool empty, so Amanda and I were able to focus on our crucial Freecell games. The more we played, the more I began talking to her like I would talk to a friend my age.

I told her about my nervousness of packing and moving to Florida.

I told her about my nervousness of meeting my roommates.

I told about my nervousness of working at Disney, seeing an opportunity that could lead to a professional career, but not achieving my goal.

After my deep ramblings about my life and future – I received the best advice. All from an amazing teenager.

“Just do your best. If you mess up smile and say sorry, then do better.” 

Perfect 🙂

I check into Disney in less that one week, and while I still may be figuring out how many clothes to bring, I’m finished worrying about the rest. I am going to smile through this adventure and take part of every opportunity. I know my short-term and long-term goals, only thing I can give now is my best.

Want to know the best part? When I asked Amanda how she got to be so smart and give such smart advice, she answered that’s what I told her right before swimming championships. What great sisterly advice.